taking a slight break from the site, mostly due to computer issues. occasionally i’m blogging from a rather upscale internet bar with a muslim shop next door selling outstanding naan for RMB3. i’ve got my headphones on, but I can still hear the only other foreigner screaming in french on skype. yesterday my roommate, also french, fell asleep cooking pasta and managed to burn a hole through the bottom of the pot. i didn’t realize that was possible.

went to a predominately african, french, and mongolian house party on friday. good times had by all, and I even played some music. I tried to keep it accessible but not retarded so I played…

1. Kurtis Blow – The Breaks

2. James Brown – Hipsters’ Ave.

3. Simian Mobile Disco / Justice – We Are Your Friends

4. Salt N Pepa – Push It

5. Athene – Hercules and Love Affair

which prompted many to dance, and one rather pushy friend of the host to scream… 

“what the fuck is this shit? whose iPod is that? play some fucking 50 cent or akon.”

trying hard to keep people happy, I even played “Rosa Parks,” but no. I lost iPod control, and we listened to akon and wyclef streaming from YouTube. christ.

later I even played some Fela Kuti (“Water No Get Enemy), which I thought (admittedly stereotypical thinking) all these African cats would get down to it. wrong again.

Last night.

after hours of dancing at the last micro-shelter party, I decided to skip the $1.50 cab ride and throw on a podcast. titled “songs to get killed in the woods to,” it made for a perfect soundtrack to a sunrise stroll through one of the safest cities in the world. at least as far as violent crimes go; there’s a whole lot of theivin’ in these here streets.

peep it, and tons of other top-notch podcasts at XLR8R. full issues of their magazine available in PDF format for free too.

Tobacco – Songs To Get Killed In The Woods To  (direct link to XLR8R site)

This street – all duck, all day. What’s that bit on the right?

Today in class, a discussion about “which would you rather give up: cell phone or computer?” led into talk about internet cafés in the students’ respective cities. One kid from Taipei mentioned this -

“In Taipei..there’s a lot of, you know, bad people in the Internet café. Sometimes, not in all [internet bars], they put the…you know, drugs in the air conditioner. Then when people play the games, they, they smell the drugs and they like it, so they want that (leans back; eyes closed like someone nodding out). Not all, but sometimes.”

There’s some woman who spends probably four or five hours in my gym daily. Mid 40′s, always clad in something vulgar, doing all sorts of like, sex raptor exercises that no one else in the gym, or any other gym does. For example, she’ll perch up on the weight bench, grab the bar, and do some kind of dolphin move while Backstreet Boys bleeds out of her headphones. Eyes closed, always.

There’s also a desk at my gym with a huge sign that says “Interesting Class.” Most of these classes, including “Hot Pub-Dance,”  “Nike Dancehall,” and “My Humps” seem to just teach the kind of dance moves De La Soul used to diss rappers about in 1989.

Sometimes students ask to look through my iPod, and they always look through the songs menu, never the artists. I guess in Asia (the world?) artists have such a short life span that the name becomes meaningless. Or maybe I’m rambling like a music snob.

I’ve asked about thirty cab drivers in Shanghai how many hours they work on a usual day – they always reply between twenty and twenty-two. Luckily for everyone on the road, they get the next day off to sleep. I can always tell when it’s nearing the end of their shift. Heavily squinted eyes, sudden stops, and pretending like they can’t understand my Chinese give it away. When I lack sleep, I make mistakes. For example, yesterday I accidentally started to brush my teeth with my ex-toothbrush (once I retire a toothbrush from dental duties, it becomes a sneaker grooming tool).

The cab shifts start at 5:30 a.m., so the shyster in this tale has no excuse. Early yesterday morning I stepped into the backseat of one of the most audacious cabbies I’ve encountered in over a year of living in Shanghai. Going from Jing An Temple to around People’s square (the subway wasn’t open yet), normally a five minute, RMB11 ($1.60) cab ride, turned into a sunrise jaunt down the highway until landing in Gubei, miles away from fuck-all and RMB56 ($8.16) later. I tossed the actual fare to my requested destination I requested in dude’s face, which he didn’t argue over, assumedly to save face.

Yesterday I set out looking for the Chinese food which most closely resembles a sandwich, rou jia mo. I found it down on Wujiang Lu, one of the oldest street food spots in Shanghai. Side bummer, it’s quickly turning into a vapid cluster fuck of international brand names and local imitations. There’s a store that only sells Disney sneakers. Whiney the Pooh high-tops? Holla. Unfortunately, when I got to the front of the ten-minute line, the chicken and bun had just finished a recycled oil bath… Gotta hit up the Muslim spots for the ones with that dried lamb (below). Much, much better.

Speaking of food, I just found this cut from one of my favorite MCs, Edan, rapping about that very subject.

Edan – Beautiful Food

not that cats aren’t still dropping nice material, but compared to this…

Excellent essay analyzing gangsta rap in the era of crack and it’s more commercial form in the era of post-industrial unemployment by Atlantic writer Ta-Nehisi Coates. Also, if you don’t know the track the author claims ushered in the era of gangsterism, peep it here.

Schoolly D - P.S.K. (What Does It Mean?)

The odor of alcohol bumped into me as soon as I entered my grade twelve classroom yesterday, ready to see who knew the extent of the economic crisis on the weekly current events quiz. “Strange” I thought. “It really smells like…partytime in here.” I glanced around the room and noticed one student clutching the wall, hunched over the trash can. Dry heaving.

Me: “I don’t understand….are you drunk right now?”

Student: “A litttttttle bit. It’s cool”

Me: “No, definitely not cool (still shocked and trying not to laugh). It’s 2:00 p.m., why are you drinking?”

Student: “Well…I wanted to talk, wanted to talk to this girl..so I had to, like, get my confidence up.”

Me: “Well, did it work?”

Student: “No.”

Some more rambling transpired, then I had to take the student to the office. I’m not that lax teacher who just lets kids get crunk in class. The office sent him back to me fifteen minutes later, breaking the test’s silence with “Mr. Ian…that wasn’t cool…” then stumbled to his desk and passed out.

Apparently the student also puked out the window of our classroom (on the third floor) and onto the playground where little kids run around constantly.

One of the best mixes I’ve heard in some time. This ain’t some Hype Machine, Abletoned Cut Copy remix of a remix electro, this that real deal. If you want to [begin to] understand the relationship between Kraftwerk, the Soul Sonic Force, and what’s going on now, peep this.

DJ Ayres – 10 Deep Mix Vol. 5 Electrofied (remember, right-click save as. big file)

A week or so ago, I caught one of the best shows I’ve ever seen – Daedelus at The Shelter. Dude rolls with some wild equipment that looks like a Japanese electric-light version of chess, which you can buy here for a lot of money. Completely unlike a typical laptop DJ setup. He also danced and sweated through his whole set in full Victorian garb. Unfortunately, my camera died as I tried to take the first picture of the night, so I can only offer some tracks and this video of a live performance in Japan. Check this interview also, fascinating character.

Daedelus – At My Heels

Daedelus – Fair Weather Friends

Short post tonight, as it’s midnight and classes resume tomorrow…I think we’ll watch the vice presidential debates in my international relations class. I wandered around my neighborhood quite a bit this week, and it seems that Jing An district will look like downtown Hong Kong Island in a few years. Massive redevelopment everywhere, BMW promotions outside the temple, and lots of shopping bags with expensive names, but I can still find three kuai muslim bread and two-for-five lamb kabobs.

Observation of the week – Lemme Ride

As part of a new segment on the site, I’ll bring you a curious fact about life in Shanghai. This week’s concerns the baffling rejection of something that grown American men will literally revert to playground shit-talking and potentially physical violence about -  riding in the [shotgun] front passenger seat. Chinese people just don’t dig it. Apparently the plush reclining leather of a Buick, Mercedes, or Audi pales in comparision to the backseat. I can’t figure it out. Maybe rolling in the back gives a face boost? I asked a cab driver, who guessed that Chinese consider the back safer. Odd, because none of the backseats in Chinese cabs have seatbelts. I may try to hitchhike the next time I spot an empty bucket in a A6.

Chinese readers, any ideas on this one?

I’m sick of Sarah Palin’s “main street” babble. Time for bed.

Oh, I also came home really late last night and I spotted two women driving motorbikes with whole pigs, bellies sliced wide open, strapped on the back.

These songs made for a nice walk around town the other night. The whole Hayzee album is available on one of the big blogs, though I can’t remember which. Google dat’.

Hayzee – Press Start

James Resse & The Progressions – Jody’s Freeze

“Did you stop blogging?”

“No, I’ve just been lunchin’. Eatin oreos.”

Long blogging hiatus. Aside from registering to vote (five minutes), chasing roaches in the kitchen (painstaking hours and a broken toaster), and trying to buy fireworks (unfruitful), I’ve got no excuses. It’s now the Chinese National Holiday, celebrating the communist victory of 1949, which for me means…

+ No work for seven days

- Super expensive flights and overbooked trains preclude traveling. None of my neighbors seem to have work either and they threw a 9am karaoke party today starting with “Come on Ilene” in Chinese

+ Lots of fireworks

- Fireworks start around 8am, and no one wants to sell any to a foreigner. Maybe there’s some unspoken rule about not selling fireworks to us. I’ve asked taxi drivers, dvd vendors, random people on the subway… no luck

- Subways jammed with “first trip on a subway, ever” people carrying large boxes

+ Some girl came up to me on the street and handed me some mint chocolate chip ice cream.

I guess I also spent quite a bit of time this week digging through a big box of funk, soul, and old school tracks. Here’s a few of my favorites that provide a nice barrier to the empty orchestra next door.

Audio Two – I Get The Papers

Bootsy Collins – I’d Rather Be With You